A Father’s Letter to His Daughters…

I have been thinking a lot lately.

I have been thinking about all of our mornings at Starbucks and the conversations we have had about God and life.

I have been thinking about all the nights we laid in your bed and asked questions and talked about all of your dreams.

I have been thinking about all the hikes we have taken and how we talked about beauty and peace and contentment and joy.

Those are the most amazing moments I have ever had in my life.

I will never forget them as long as I live.

But while we have shared in so many special moments and had so many amazing conversations, in too many ways, I have been the stereotypical man, unable to fully open up and express my heart and my feelings to you.

So first let me say that, even though I tell you every night that I love you… I really do love you with all of my heart. And there will never be another man in your life who will love you as much as I do. But I pray that there will, one day, be a man who comes close to seeing you as I see you… and loving you as I love you.

I don’t ever want you to forget that your worth and value and beauty come from God and God alone… and that is the most liberating reality you will ever experience. In that truth you will never have to measure up to the unreasonable expectations of our society or of any man about how you should look, what you should believe about yourself, or how you should act.

You are worthy and valuable and beautiful and loved… simply by being you.

And that will never change.

So refuse to ever buy into another narrative about yourself. Because other narratives are cheap fabrications that promise you everything, but will never come close to your true identity, worth, and value as a daughter of God.

The images you are bombarded with in commercials, television shows, and on the front of magazines are trying to convince you of their standard of beauty and how you can attain it.

The truth is that your beauty does not come from the make-up you wear, the style of your hair, the curviness of your body, the perfection of your skin, or the youthfulness of your appearance. Your beauty comes solely from the radiance of God in the way that you humbly and lovingly let God work through your life.

That is unsurpassed beauty. And I hope and pray that you will never forget that.

Your worth, value, and beauty are also not defined by or dependent upon any man.

You are no less of a woman for remaining pure and waiting to have sex with your future husband.

Sure you will hear the loud and mocking voices calling your decision antiquated and naive, but having your heart intact and not shattered into a million pieces is invaluable.

Some things are worth the wait. And this is one of them.

You will be told by many that engaging in sex and sexual activity is completely normal and natural before you are married, but if a young man does not respect you as a young woman and your pursuit of purity then he is not worthy of you.

You are not a means to his end.

Yes that is an incredibly high standard, but you are worth it. And you do not have to compromise or settle for anyone, ever.

You are a beautiful young woman who God will use in amazing ways throughout your life.  I love you with all of my heart.

I will always be incredibly proud to be your father.



Also read 3 Reasons Every Mom Needs to Talk to Her Son About Porn.

52 thoughts on “A Father’s Letter to His Daughters…

    1. Beautiful. There is a moment in the film COURAGEOUS when a daughter looks at a ring her father has given her after a dinner ‘date’ they’ve shared together. It encapsulates through cinema what you’ve written here. So valuable to our daughters. Thank you.

  1. This is beautiful! My dad said something similar to me when I was coming of age, and I will never forget it. I am sharing this with my own daughter who has begun to wonder about boys, her worth, and her place in the world. Girls need to hear that they are perfectly loved just as they are. :-)

  2. Thank You Brandon, even though some of the things you said are mentioned to women over and over, nothing beats hearing them from a respected man who actually believes what he is saying!

  3. That was amazing! We watch alot of veggie tales in our house and there is a veggie tales movie that teaches about inner beauty. Its called Snoodarella, like Cinderella. I just thought I would share because its a cute, fun way to teach toddlers about inner beauty.

  4. If only every father would talk to his daughter(s) this way! I think that many young women lose their virginity because they “are looking for love in all the wrong places.” A father, more than anyone, can make his daughter feel like a princess and give her a sense of self worth. Thank you!

  5. God bless you for the love and strength you are offering your kids in posts like this one. I imagine much more has been “soaking” into them, day-to-day, throughout the years.

    Thank you for following my blog.

  6. Thanks for following Walk with Me. This particular blog, “A Father’s Letter…,” reminds me of a practice I share with everyone I can. I started praying for my daughter’s husband and my son’s wife as soon as my wife and I knew she was pregnant with each of them. It helped remind me of the conversation we fathers sometimes fail to have with our children about the precious gift they are and the importance of purity and faithfulness from an early age.

  7. How I wish my father had said these things to me! But as you put it in the beginning, men find it hard to open up. it’s only now, as I’m grown with children of my own, that my dad is starting to open up. Thanks for writing this. I’m trying to express it to my girl, her worth in Christ alone. And thanks for the follow.

  8. A friend said once of his distrust issues, that the Father had told him “I know you have learnt to trust me, now you have to learn to trust the people I’ve placed in your life too.”
    I know the Father loves me, I have no doubt of that, but I cannot imagine a man loving me too. I asked for total restoration, everything back and He never fails. When I read this, my friends words came back to me in a personal way…”I know you know I love you, now you have to receive the love of the person I send you too.” It reminded me of God’s great love for me, His precious daughter, His desire for me to be loved here, on earth as in heaven. May His Kingdom come! Amen.

  9. Beautiful post, I will be sharing it with my daughter! Think you for “following” me, I’m now blessed to follow you as well. I look forward to reading more from you. Have a great day!

  10. I have a 7 month old Daughter your dreams are my dreams. I hope, if you don”t mind, I would like to keep a copy of this.

  11. This is a beautiful entry. Thanks for stopping by my blog. I’m so glad I got to read this letter. Your daughters are blessed to have you as a Dad!

  12. This is absolutely beautiful and brought tears to my eyes. It must be every girls wish that her Daddy loves her so much. What a legacy you will leave for your Princess.

  13. I absolutely love this! A father’s voice is so important in his daughter(s) life, especially during the preteen and teen years.

    Thank you for stopping by to read and follow my blog I look forward to reading your blog. I am re-blogging this post onto my page. My heart is for women to understand their identity and authority in Christ as ambassadors of God’s kingdom. God bless you and yours!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s